Lesson:
I am thrilled with how well this class is learning! They are so enthusiastic about their writing, and their interest and effort are producing wonderful results. Their compositions show marked improvement every week as they apply their new lesson.
We opened class with a brief review of basics we have covered so far:
Clear communication
expressed in a lively way (vivid word choice, use of senses and emotion)
in correct paragraph form
with sensible organization
and sentence variety. (We will work more on this.)
We then spent some time explaining what we are seeking in the next assignment, which is a place description. I provided large color landscape pictures taken from calendars, from which students could choose their favorite. I asked the students to think about how many photos a photographer might take to get one great shot, and why he or she might have chosen that particular photo instead of another one. In other words, what is interesting, unusual, or special about this photo? Where is its drama? That is what we want to capture.
Like description in general, students will need first to observe the place in question, using as many of the five senses as apply. The difference, for most students, is that they must do this in their imaginations. I asked them to pretend they were in the location of their photo:
What do they see? Shapes, sizes, colors, textures? What colors? (Choose color names like those in the 64-crayon box, not the 8-crayon box.)
What might they feel around them? Soft, warm breezes? Hot, heavy stillness? Cool frosty chill? Piercing bitter cold?
What might they hear? Spring leaves rustling gently, autumn leaves crunching crisply? Songbirds lilting, seabirds cawing? Bees buzzing, crickets chirping, toads thrumming? Thunder clashing, waterfalls crashing, mountain streams splashing? Surf pounding? Silent stillness resounding?
What might they smell? Fresh air after a rain? Fragrant flowers in full bloom? Dry, windblown dust? Damp sea air?
What might they taste? Any notable taste in the air? (Though unlikely in most landscape settings, taste might factor in scenes full of dust, sand, or salt water.)
What movement might take place? Ripe grain heads bobbing and bowing in the wind? Water cascading downstream? Lightning flashing across the sky? (Motion helps to add life, so include it if appropriate.)
What overall mood prevails? Calm and peaceful? Stormy and foreboding? Lonely? Awestruck? Joyous? Powerful? Majestic? Welcoming? Comforting? Hostile? (Choose descriptive words that fit the mood.)
In selecting descriptive phrases, students should make the effort to include at least one, preferably two, instances of the following figures of speech:
Simile --- a comparison using the words "like" or "as"
"My love is like a red, red rose . . ." Robert Burns
Metaphor --- a comparison without using the words "like" or as"
"Love is a rose . . ." Neil Young
Personification --- ascribing aspects of personhood or personality to inanimate objects
"Love is blind . . ." William Shakespeare
As they 'observe' their setting, students might jot down their ideas and comments as we have done for previous paragraphs. From those notes, students can filter, edit, combine, and eliminate details to choose what they wish to include. They will then need to organize their select observations in a physical order that makes sense for the scene they are framing: top to bottom, bottom to top, left to right, right to left, panorama to zoomed-in close-up, focused detail to wide-pan vista. Their words will guide the reader's eye.
With those details in order, students will proceed with the normal writing process. They will compose a catchy topic sentence, an effective conclusion, and an intriguing title. They will join sentences together using transition expressions, creating sentence variety with opening phrases and clauses. [We will continue to cover this more.] After a "breather" period, students will go back to edit and polish their work to their satisfaction, then prepare a smooth final version.
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After explaining that lesson, we rounded out the class session by reading aloud some of the object descriptions the students had written the previous week. Many students brought to class the object under examination, so their classmates enjoyed matching the description to the actual item.
Assignment:
Each student will compose a paragraph describing a natural landscape, as described above. Most students will use the calendar pictures I provided, which they will return when they hand in their homework. A few will choose another familiar landscape, but should bring in a photo for the class to view. As we read the paragraphs aloud during our next session, the class will try to match up the photos with their descriptions.
These papers are to be pure description, not narratives. Students are not to make up stories to superimpose upon the settings.
This assignment will be due October 31. Class will not meet next week,October 24.
With an extra week available, some students may choose to write a longer paper this time, or even to write two papers. That is an extra-credit option, but is not required.
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