Lesson:
I am thrilled with how well this class is learning! They are so enthusiastic about their writing, and their interest and effort are producing wonderful results. Their compositions show marked improvement every week as they apply their new lesson.
We opened class with a brief review of basics we have covered so far:
Clear communication
expressed in a lively way (vivid word choice, use of senses and emotion)
in correct paragraph form
with sensible organization
and sentence variety. (We will work more on this.)
We then spent some time explaining what we are seeking in the next assignment, which is a place description. I provided large color landscape pictures taken from calendars, from which students could choose their favorite. I asked the students to think about how many photos a photographer might take to get one great shot, and why he or she might have chosen that particular photo instead of another one. In other words, what is interesting, unusual, or special about this photo? Where is its drama? That is what we want to capture.
Like description in general, students will need first to observe the place in question, using as many of the five senses as apply. The difference, for most students, is that they must do this in their imaginations. I asked them to pretend they were in the location of their photo:
What do they see? Shapes, sizes, colors, textures? What colors? (Choose color names like those in the 64-crayon box, not the 8-crayon box.)
What might they feel around them? Soft, warm breezes? Hot, heavy stillness? Cool frosty chill? Piercing bitter cold?
What might they hear? Spring leaves rustling gently, autumn leaves crunching crisply? Songbirds lilting, seabirds cawing? Bees buzzing, crickets chirping, toads thrumming? Thunder clashing, waterfalls crashing, mountain streams splashing? Surf pounding? Silent stillness resounding?
What might they smell? Fresh air after a rain? Fragrant flowers in full bloom? Dry, windblown dust? Damp sea air?
What might they taste? Any notable taste in the air? (Though unlikely in most landscape settings, taste might factor in scenes full of dust, sand, or salt water.)
What movement might take place? Ripe grain heads bobbing and bowing in the wind? Water cascading downstream? Lightning flashing across the sky? (Motion helps to add life, so include it if appropriate.)
What overall mood prevails? Calm and peaceful? Stormy and foreboding? Lonely? Awestruck? Joyous? Powerful? Majestic? Welcoming? Comforting? Hostile? (Choose descriptive words that fit the mood.)
In selecting descriptive phrases, students should make the effort to include at least one, preferably two, instances of the following figures of speech:
Simile --- a comparison using the words "like" or "as"
"My love is like a red, red rose . . ." Robert Burns
Metaphor --- a comparison without using the words "like" or as"
"Love is a rose . . ." Neil Young
Personification --- ascribing aspects of personhood or personality to inanimate objects
"Love is blind . . ." William Shakespeare
As they 'observe' their setting, students might jot down their ideas and comments as we have done for previous paragraphs. From those notes, students can filter, edit, combine, and eliminate details to choose what they wish to include. They will then need to organize their select observations in a physical order that makes sense for the scene they are framing: top to bottom, bottom to top, left to right, right to left, panorama to zoomed-in close-up, focused detail to wide-pan vista. Their words will guide the reader's eye.
With those details in order, students will proceed with the normal writing process. They will compose a catchy topic sentence, an effective conclusion, and an intriguing title. They will join sentences together using transition expressions, creating sentence variety with opening phrases and clauses. [We will continue to cover this more.] After a "breather" period, students will go back to edit and polish their work to their satisfaction, then prepare a smooth final version.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After explaining that lesson, we rounded out the class session by reading aloud some of the object descriptions the students had written the previous week. Many students brought to class the object under examination, so their classmates enjoyed matching the description to the actual item.
Assignment:
Each student will compose a paragraph describing a natural landscape, as described above. Most students will use the calendar pictures I provided, which they will return when they hand in their homework. A few will choose another familiar landscape, but should bring in a photo for the class to view. As we read the paragraphs aloud during our next session, the class will try to match up the photos with their descriptions.
These papers are to be pure description, not narratives. Students are not to make up stories to superimpose upon the settings.
This assignment will be due October 31. Class will not meet next week,October 24.
With an extra week available, some students may choose to write a longer paper this time, or even to write two papers. That is an extra-credit option, but is not required.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
7th - 8th Writing, October 17
Lesson:
In this class period, we addressed common errors uncovered in grading the students' previous assignment.
I again stressed the need for unambiguous clarity regarding the thesis. I told the students that they need to be able to reduce their thesis statement to short, straightforward, powerful bullet points. Those bullet points then plug into the corresponding slots on our five-paragraph essay diagram. That structure forms the skeleton of the essay. From there, the students should flesh out those bones with supporting examples and details, and fully clothe their creation in elegant, flowing prose. However, when all is said and done, the clarity and power of those original bullet points should be just as clear to the reader as they were to the author in the beginning.
Other errors addressed were as follows:
Number agreement
Tense agreement
Parallel construction of concepts at the thesis level
Naming the subject (nouns, not pronouns) in the thesis statement
For all that, I must say that the definition essays turned in this week exhibit a much higher level of writing skill than the previous assignment. The students show that they are incorporating and applying what they are learning each week. In general, their word choices and sentence variety were excellent.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We spent the remainder of the class period teaching the concept and format for a block-style compare/contrast essay. (If I get access to a scanner, I will attach a diagram here.)
For a simple contrast paper, students are to choose two things which seem similar, then explore the features that distinguish them as different. Examples might include:
dogs and cats (both small mammals commonly kept as household pets)
McDonald's and Wendy's (both fast food burger joints)
Target and WalMart (both large discount chain stores)
football and soccer (both popular team sports played by moving a ball down a field to score)
FDR and Churchill (both allied leaders during WWII)
Lord of the Rings and Chronicles of Narnia (both beloved classic fantasy with Christian underpinnings)
Star Trek and Star Wars (both influential sci fi series and cultural icons)
and many, many more.
Provide background and acknowledge similarities in the intro paragraph. Then delineate the categories of differences in the thesis statement. ("Cats and dogs differ in sociability, trainability, and usefulness." )
The body paragraphs will follow, each developing in order one of the three main points of the thesis statement. In our example, the next paragraph will discuss differences in the animals' sociability, the following paragraph will address their comparative levels of trainability, and the one after that will explore their relative degrees and roles of usefulness.
Finally, the concluding paragraph will begin with a restatement of the ideas of the thesis statement, followed by a sentence of two recapping the main point of each of the three body paragraphs. From there, that last paragraph broadens out to an overall conclusion, which might include a statement of preference, prediction, quotation, etc.
How this differs from the previous five-paragraph essays is that each of these three main points must be discussed for each of these two subjects. So, in the paragraph discussing sociability, for instance, the author will lead in with a topic sentences, then spend several sentences exploring the social behavior of cats. Next, with a pivot expression, ("on the other hand" . . .) the author will turn the topic to sociability in dogs for a few sentences, before concluding the paragraph gracefully with a reflection of the topic sentence. The same idea goes for the other two body paragraphs as well.
Whenever these subjects are mentioned together, they must remain in their original order. So, if cats are mentioned before dogs in the thesis statement, cats will always be mentioned first in any paragraph or sentence where dogs are also mentioned. Therefore, choose your starting order strategically.
Assignments:
Each student will write a five-paragraph block-style contrast essay on a topic of choice.
Students may treat the subjects in an impartial way, or may clearly state a preference.
Everything else we have learned applies.
This assignment is due October 31. Class will not meet next week, October 24.
With the extra week, students may opt to rewrite a low-scoring paper for an extra-credit grade.
In this class period, we addressed common errors uncovered in grading the students' previous assignment.
I again stressed the need for unambiguous clarity regarding the thesis. I told the students that they need to be able to reduce their thesis statement to short, straightforward, powerful bullet points. Those bullet points then plug into the corresponding slots on our five-paragraph essay diagram. That structure forms the skeleton of the essay. From there, the students should flesh out those bones with supporting examples and details, and fully clothe their creation in elegant, flowing prose. However, when all is said and done, the clarity and power of those original bullet points should be just as clear to the reader as they were to the author in the beginning.
Other errors addressed were as follows:
Number agreement
Tense agreement
Parallel construction of concepts at the thesis level
Naming the subject (nouns, not pronouns) in the thesis statement
For all that, I must say that the definition essays turned in this week exhibit a much higher level of writing skill than the previous assignment. The students show that they are incorporating and applying what they are learning each week. In general, their word choices and sentence variety were excellent.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We spent the remainder of the class period teaching the concept and format for a block-style compare/contrast essay. (If I get access to a scanner, I will attach a diagram here.)
For a simple contrast paper, students are to choose two things which seem similar, then explore the features that distinguish them as different. Examples might include:
dogs and cats (both small mammals commonly kept as household pets)
McDonald's and Wendy's (both fast food burger joints)
Target and WalMart (both large discount chain stores)
football and soccer (both popular team sports played by moving a ball down a field to score)
FDR and Churchill (both allied leaders during WWII)
Lord of the Rings and Chronicles of Narnia (both beloved classic fantasy with Christian underpinnings)
Star Trek and Star Wars (both influential sci fi series and cultural icons)
and many, many more.
Provide background and acknowledge similarities in the intro paragraph. Then delineate the categories of differences in the thesis statement. ("Cats and dogs differ in sociability, trainability, and usefulness." )
The body paragraphs will follow, each developing in order one of the three main points of the thesis statement. In our example, the next paragraph will discuss differences in the animals' sociability, the following paragraph will address their comparative levels of trainability, and the one after that will explore their relative degrees and roles of usefulness.
Finally, the concluding paragraph will begin with a restatement of the ideas of the thesis statement, followed by a sentence of two recapping the main point of each of the three body paragraphs. From there, that last paragraph broadens out to an overall conclusion, which might include a statement of preference, prediction, quotation, etc.
How this differs from the previous five-paragraph essays is that each of these three main points must be discussed for each of these two subjects. So, in the paragraph discussing sociability, for instance, the author will lead in with a topic sentences, then spend several sentences exploring the social behavior of cats. Next, with a pivot expression, ("on the other hand" . . .) the author will turn the topic to sociability in dogs for a few sentences, before concluding the paragraph gracefully with a reflection of the topic sentence. The same idea goes for the other two body paragraphs as well.
Whenever these subjects are mentioned together, they must remain in their original order. So, if cats are mentioned before dogs in the thesis statement, cats will always be mentioned first in any paragraph or sentence where dogs are also mentioned. Therefore, choose your starting order strategically.
Assignments:
Each student will write a five-paragraph block-style contrast essay on a topic of choice.
Students may treat the subjects in an impartial way, or may clearly state a preference.
Everything else we have learned applies.
This assignment is due October 31. Class will not meet next week, October 24.
With the extra week, students may opt to rewrite a low-scoring paper for an extra-credit grade.
9th - 12th Writing, October 17
Lesson:
These students show remarkable improvement in clarity and expression of thought. In fact, they are making evident progress in word choice and sentence variety each week.
We spent the largest part of this class period addressing various problem areas from the students' most recent essays. Most errors were fairly minor and infrequent; a few were more fundamental and serious.
Specifically, I asked students to:
~ organize arguments logically
Sensible organization not only makes writing easier, but it also makes a greater impact on the reader.
The most likely method of organization for this type of essay is order of importance, from least to greatest.
Another possible method might be cause to effect.
~ make subject and verb agree in number (singular/plural)
All students (plural) should bring their (plural) notebooks. (plural)
or Each student (singular) should bring a notebook. (singular)
NOT Everyone (singular) should bring their (plural) notebook.
~ make verbs agree in tense (past/present)
(NO 'time-travelling' allowed --- that technology has not been perfected yet.)
~ use parallel construction for items in series
Leadership requires courageous vision, determined responsibility, and persuasive communication.
NOT Leadership requires courageous vision, determined responsibility, and communicating well.
(NOTE: Students generally did quite well at this in the ways we discussed last time, so I was able to teach some fuller applications and refinements.)
~ qualify statements; avoid absolute statements
Unless we may be absolutely certain that our claim is completely true and accurate in every single instance, at all times and in all places without exception, we ought to avoid absolute terms such as always, never, every, all, each, etc.
Instead, use qualifying words and expressions, such as almost always, virtually never, nearly every, usually, seldom, most, many, some, etc.
When we make unsubstantiated absolute statements, we tend to provoke resistance and lose the trust of our readers. However, when we speak accurately by qualifying our statements, we generally find our ideas receive a more responsive hearing.
Assignment:
Each student will write another compare or contrast essay in five-paragraph block form.
This assignment will be due October 31. Class will not meet next week.
With the extra week available, students may, at their option, rewrite their lowest-scoring paper for a higher grade.
These students show remarkable improvement in clarity and expression of thought. In fact, they are making evident progress in word choice and sentence variety each week.
We spent the largest part of this class period addressing various problem areas from the students' most recent essays. Most errors were fairly minor and infrequent; a few were more fundamental and serious.
Specifically, I asked students to:
~ organize arguments logically
Sensible organization not only makes writing easier, but it also makes a greater impact on the reader.
The most likely method of organization for this type of essay is order of importance, from least to greatest.
Another possible method might be cause to effect.
~ make subject and verb agree in number (singular/plural)
All students (plural) should bring their (plural) notebooks. (plural)
or Each student (singular) should bring a notebook. (singular)
NOT Everyone (singular) should bring their (plural) notebook.
~ make verbs agree in tense (past/present)
(NO 'time-travelling' allowed --- that technology has not been perfected yet.)
~ use parallel construction for items in series
Leadership requires courageous vision, determined responsibility, and persuasive communication.
NOT Leadership requires courageous vision, determined responsibility, and communicating well.
(NOTE: Students generally did quite well at this in the ways we discussed last time, so I was able to teach some fuller applications and refinements.)
~ qualify statements; avoid absolute statements
Unless we may be absolutely certain that our claim is completely true and accurate in every single instance, at all times and in all places without exception, we ought to avoid absolute terms such as always, never, every, all, each, etc.
Instead, use qualifying words and expressions, such as almost always, virtually never, nearly every, usually, seldom, most, many, some, etc.
When we make unsubstantiated absolute statements, we tend to provoke resistance and lose the trust of our readers. However, when we speak accurately by qualifying our statements, we generally find our ideas receive a more responsive hearing.
Assignment:
Each student will write another compare or contrast essay in five-paragraph block form.
This assignment will be due October 31. Class will not meet next week.
With the extra week available, students may, at their option, rewrite their lowest-scoring paper for a higher grade.
AP Writing, October 16
Lesson:
We briefly discussed the students' experiences with the revision process. Having graded their revisions since class, I can attest that their revised essays showed tremendous improvement over their first efforts, so I am quite pleased with their final essays.
Then we discussed each students personal strengths and weaknesses as writers, with suggestions for growth. Some areas we touched on included:
clarity of topic focus
restraint in breadth of discussion (e.g., avoiding rabbit trails)
awareness of and appeal to target audience
selection of appropriate supporting evidence
correctness of form
These students are doing wonderfully and maturing rapidly in their composition skills.
Assignment:
Each student will write one more compare or contrast essay, their choice, in five-paragraph block form.
This assignment will be due October 30. Class will not meet next week.
We briefly discussed the students' experiences with the revision process. Having graded their revisions since class, I can attest that their revised essays showed tremendous improvement over their first efforts, so I am quite pleased with their final essays.
Then we discussed each students personal strengths and weaknesses as writers, with suggestions for growth. Some areas we touched on included:
clarity of topic focus
restraint in breadth of discussion (e.g., avoiding rabbit trails)
awareness of and appeal to target audience
selection of appropriate supporting evidence
correctness of form
These students are doing wonderfully and maturing rapidly in their composition skills.
Assignment:
Each student will write one more compare or contrast essay, their choice, in five-paragraph block form.
This assignment will be due October 30. Class will not meet next week.
Friday, October 10, 2008
4th - 6th Writing, October 10
Lesson:
We spent the first part of the class reviewing some basic ideas:
~ Collect your good ideas and put them into the correct paragraph form.
~ Make that paragraph easy for the reader to understand and follow by clear, logical organization that leads your reader along with you step-by-step from intro to conclusion.
~ Keep that well-organized paragraph lively and interesting to your reader by choosing vivid action verbs and strong descriptions that evoke the senses, motion, and emotion.
~ Add even more readability to your interesting paragraph by using a variety of ways to begin different sentences.
We added There is, There are, It is, and similar expressions to our no-no list as legal but weak ways to begin sentences.
To help organize and add variety to sentences, I provided each student with a sheet of transition expressions. These transitions are organized into groups that can be used to show time, location, similarities, differences, and so on, so that students can easily choose words that suit their method of organization for any writing project. We will be discussing more about using these transition words skillfully in the coming weeks, especially as we begin to emphasize sentence variety.
Up until now, most of our early writing assignments have been narratives, organized in chronological(time) order. Now we are switching to descriptive papers for a few weeks, with details organized in spatial (place) order. I told the class to imagine they are movie directors, deciding how the camera will reveal their object on screen. Will they choose to start at the top and work down? Start at the bottom and work up? Start out with a general shot and then zoom in for a close-up? Start with close focus on some small detail and then pan out to an overview? As directors, they decide what will work best. All I ask is that they be consistent,not jumping all around but rather flowing smoothly through their description, using transition expressions to guide the reader's mind like a movie camera guides the filmgoer's eye.
Next, we talked about preparing to write a description of a physical object by first spending some time observing that object using as many of the five sense as we can, really paying attention to what we can discover as we jot down our observations on our brainstorming mind maps. I showed some example objects to the class as we talked together about how we might describe the colors, textures, and so on.
To wrap up, we read aloud a few student papers, commenting on the good features, suggesting one way the authors could now use what we are learning about transitions and sentence variety to make their next papers even better.
Assignment:
Each student will write an interesting, well-organized paragraph describing a physical object. This may be any individual tangible item: a sea shell, rock, figurine, banana, apple, orange, baseball, soccer net, basketball hoop, old shoe, tea cup, candlestick, --- almost anything. We will be describing places and people later, so I do not want students to tackle those yet. A few students asked about describing pets; that is acceptable as long as the paragraph is limited to physical description, not behavior or personality. It might be easier, though, to choose an inanimate object.
Students should incorporate all we have learned, with special effort to incorporate some appropriate transitions and some sentence variety.
We spent the first part of the class reviewing some basic ideas:
~ Collect your good ideas and put them into the correct paragraph form.
~ Make that paragraph easy for the reader to understand and follow by clear, logical organization that leads your reader along with you step-by-step from intro to conclusion.
~ Keep that well-organized paragraph lively and interesting to your reader by choosing vivid action verbs and strong descriptions that evoke the senses, motion, and emotion.
~ Add even more readability to your interesting paragraph by using a variety of ways to begin different sentences.
We added There is, There are, It is, and similar expressions to our no-no list as legal but weak ways to begin sentences.
To help organize and add variety to sentences, I provided each student with a sheet of transition expressions. These transitions are organized into groups that can be used to show time, location, similarities, differences, and so on, so that students can easily choose words that suit their method of organization for any writing project. We will be discussing more about using these transition words skillfully in the coming weeks, especially as we begin to emphasize sentence variety.
Up until now, most of our early writing assignments have been narratives, organized in chronological(time) order. Now we are switching to descriptive papers for a few weeks, with details organized in spatial (place) order. I told the class to imagine they are movie directors, deciding how the camera will reveal their object on screen. Will they choose to start at the top and work down? Start at the bottom and work up? Start out with a general shot and then zoom in for a close-up? Start with close focus on some small detail and then pan out to an overview? As directors, they decide what will work best. All I ask is that they be consistent,not jumping all around but rather flowing smoothly through their description, using transition expressions to guide the reader's mind like a movie camera guides the filmgoer's eye.
Next, we talked about preparing to write a description of a physical object by first spending some time observing that object using as many of the five sense as we can, really paying attention to what we can discover as we jot down our observations on our brainstorming mind maps. I showed some example objects to the class as we talked together about how we might describe the colors, textures, and so on.
To wrap up, we read aloud a few student papers, commenting on the good features, suggesting one way the authors could now use what we are learning about transitions and sentence variety to make their next papers even better.
Assignment:
Each student will write an interesting, well-organized paragraph describing a physical object. This may be any individual tangible item: a sea shell, rock, figurine, banana, apple, orange, baseball, soccer net, basketball hoop, old shoe, tea cup, candlestick, --- almost anything. We will be describing places and people later, so I do not want students to tackle those yet. A few students asked about describing pets; that is acceptable as long as the paragraph is limited to physical description, not behavior or personality. It might be easier, though, to choose an inanimate object.
Students should incorporate all we have learned, with special effort to incorporate some appropriate transitions and some sentence variety.
7th - 8th Writing, October 10
Lesson:
We spent this class period addressing many of the same issues covered in the older classes last week and this. We talked about organizing our thoughts, honing our thesis statements, and using parallel construction. For more review of these principles, please read what I posted for the AP and 9th-12th classes these past two weeks.
We also revisited the need to use active rather than passive verbs in general, and especially to avoid beginning sentences with statements like these:
There is
There are
There were
. . .etc.
I suggested that students read through their papers several times during the revision process, first looking in general for areas that need improvement, then targeting specific troublesome elements by reading JUST verbs for active voice, then JUST sentence openers for variety. These extra measures will elevate their writing from good to excellent.
Assignment:
Each student will choose another abstract concept (e.g., honesty, patriotism, kindness) to define, explain and explore in another five-paragraph essay.
We spent this class period addressing many of the same issues covered in the older classes last week and this. We talked about organizing our thoughts, honing our thesis statements, and using parallel construction. For more review of these principles, please read what I posted for the AP and 9th-12th classes these past two weeks.
We also revisited the need to use active rather than passive verbs in general, and especially to avoid beginning sentences with statements like these:
There is
There are
There were
. . .etc.
I suggested that students read through their papers several times during the revision process, first looking in general for areas that need improvement, then targeting specific troublesome elements by reading JUST verbs for active voice, then JUST sentence openers for variety. These extra measures will elevate their writing from good to excellent.
Assignment:
Each student will choose another abstract concept (e.g., honesty, patriotism, kindness) to define, explain and explore in another five-paragraph essay.
9th - 12th Writing, October 10
Lesson:
With all students present this week, we took a deeper look into the issues discussed last week, namely:
that clear, focused thinking is essential to writing a fluent essay,
that those clear thoughts should be stated in a correctly-worded thesis statement that then guides the essay, and
that the wording of the thesis statement should be in congruent, parallel terms.
Specifically, we discussed clarifying thoughts by narrowing the range of possibilities that could be explored about any given topic, then (for our purposes in the five-paragraph essay) choosing three primary points that can be developed in a clear and balanced way. Students who fail to limit their topic and thus try to pack too many ideas into their papers usually lose their way. Students who choose as their three main points ideas that are too dissimilar, overlapping, or disconnected find themselves working much too hard to try to make sense of things. Like the prep work done before painting, half the work of writing an essay is done before actual composition begins.
I reiterated the need to choose similar grammatical construction for items in series. This is an aspect of congruence or parallelism. In our case, the three major points of a five-paragraph essay may be listed in various ways, including simple nouns, noun phrases, gerunds, infinitives, various kinds of phrases, subordinate clauses, and more. Parallel structure requires that the same format be used for all three points whenever they are listed together. If the points of a thesis cannot be rephrased somewhat comfortably into compatible terms, the thesis likely is flawed in its basic concept. If so, that would be good to know before wasting days trying to force incompatible ideas to hang together.
I hope that this stress on fundamental organizational, even if heavy on grammatical terms, will provide a solid foundation for future academic writing.
For more explanation of how to treat items in a series, check here.
For a summary of gerunds, infinitives, and participles, which together are known as verbals, check here, along with the related links at the bottom of the OWL page.
Assignment:
Since the process of finding similarities and drawing distinctions is so central to learning and to writing, each student will compose another five-paragraph, block-style compare/contrast essay. Those who wrote a comparison last time will write a contrast essay this time, and vice versa.
With all students present this week, we took a deeper look into the issues discussed last week, namely:
that clear, focused thinking is essential to writing a fluent essay,
that those clear thoughts should be stated in a correctly-worded thesis statement that then guides the essay, and
that the wording of the thesis statement should be in congruent, parallel terms.
Specifically, we discussed clarifying thoughts by narrowing the range of possibilities that could be explored about any given topic, then (for our purposes in the five-paragraph essay) choosing three primary points that can be developed in a clear and balanced way. Students who fail to limit their topic and thus try to pack too many ideas into their papers usually lose their way. Students who choose as their three main points ideas that are too dissimilar, overlapping, or disconnected find themselves working much too hard to try to make sense of things. Like the prep work done before painting, half the work of writing an essay is done before actual composition begins.
I reiterated the need to choose similar grammatical construction for items in series. This is an aspect of congruence or parallelism. In our case, the three major points of a five-paragraph essay may be listed in various ways, including simple nouns, noun phrases, gerunds, infinitives, various kinds of phrases, subordinate clauses, and more. Parallel structure requires that the same format be used for all three points whenever they are listed together. If the points of a thesis cannot be rephrased somewhat comfortably into compatible terms, the thesis likely is flawed in its basic concept. If so, that would be good to know before wasting days trying to force incompatible ideas to hang together.
I hope that this stress on fundamental organizational, even if heavy on grammatical terms, will provide a solid foundation for future academic writing.
For more explanation of how to treat items in a series, check here.
For a summary of gerunds, infinitives, and participles, which together are known as verbals, check here, along with the related links at the bottom of the OWL page.
Assignment:
Since the process of finding similarities and drawing distinctions is so central to learning and to writing, each student will compose another five-paragraph, block-style compare/contrast essay. Those who wrote a comparison last time will write a contrast essay this time, and vice versa.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
AP Writing, October 9
Lesson:
This week, we had a hard, real-life lesson in the revision process.
Revision is much more than editing or proofreading. While editing can be as simple as switching a sentence around, as obvious as swapping out an overused word for a fresh synonym, revision can be painful. "Revision" means re-seeing; revision is looking with new eyes, a a critical reader might. Revision is rethinking the paper altogether, looking objectively at what is working and what is not, and taking whatever steps are needed to fix things.
Since the students in this small class are advanced writers, I felt they were ready for a stiff challenge. We spent the class period stringently dissecting their latest essays for every single less-than-ideal choice, whether in scope, thesis, argumentation, supporting evidence, word choice --- everything. I was more brutally exacting than is my normal teaching style, but my purpose was to walk the students through steps to take when they realize something just isn't working as well as they intended.
For more info on the revision process, read here.
Assignment:
Students will completely revise their most recent essays, keeping in mind what we discussed in class.
This week, we had a hard, real-life lesson in the revision process.
Revision is much more than editing or proofreading. While editing can be as simple as switching a sentence around, as obvious as swapping out an overused word for a fresh synonym, revision can be painful. "Revision" means re-seeing; revision is looking with new eyes, a a critical reader might. Revision is rethinking the paper altogether, looking objectively at what is working and what is not, and taking whatever steps are needed to fix things.
Since the students in this small class are advanced writers, I felt they were ready for a stiff challenge. We spent the class period stringently dissecting their latest essays for every single less-than-ideal choice, whether in scope, thesis, argumentation, supporting evidence, word choice --- everything. I was more brutally exacting than is my normal teaching style, but my purpose was to walk the students through steps to take when they realize something just isn't working as well as they intended.
For more info on the revision process, read here.
Assignment:
Students will completely revise their most recent essays, keeping in mind what we discussed in class.
Monday, October 6, 2008
4th - 6th Writing, October 3
Lesson:
We spent the majority of the class period reading aloud and commenting on the personal narrative paragraphs that students had turned in the previous week. Generally, I was quite pleased with what the students had written, and their classmates received their work with appreciation and encouragement, as well.
Based on student writing so far, we reviewed two issues that trip up some students: concluding sentences and word choice.
I restated the need to finish each paragraph with a final sentences that 'wraps up' the paragraph, giving the reader a satisfying sense of completion. The concluding sentence should not contain any significant new details, or else it would simply be another detail sentence. It should, however, summarize the paragraph, state an impression, or in some other way 'tie a bow around' the topic. A concluding sentence should reflect the topic sentence, like twin bookends holding the detail sentences in the middle together.
We created a list of overused "no-no" words, which so far includes:
nice
good
fun
a lot (or alot)
awesome (unless used for something TRULY worthy of awe, like God or the Grand Canyon)
We spent the last part of the class period addressing some ideas to make their writing more vivid and to connect with their readers in a more memorable way. I taught that good writing should "show, not just tell." Specifically, we discussed giving life to our writing by including the elements of life:
the senses
motion
emotion
Assignment:
Each student is to write another personal narrative paragraph, which will be a vivid recounting of some small but interesting slice of their lives. This incident must be true, and may be funny, sad, heart-warming, scary, embarrassing, exciting, etc. In particular, they are to include descriptions from at least two of the five physical senses, together with showing motion and/or emotion.
We spent the majority of the class period reading aloud and commenting on the personal narrative paragraphs that students had turned in the previous week. Generally, I was quite pleased with what the students had written, and their classmates received their work with appreciation and encouragement, as well.
Based on student writing so far, we reviewed two issues that trip up some students: concluding sentences and word choice.
I restated the need to finish each paragraph with a final sentences that 'wraps up' the paragraph, giving the reader a satisfying sense of completion. The concluding sentence should not contain any significant new details, or else it would simply be another detail sentence. It should, however, summarize the paragraph, state an impression, or in some other way 'tie a bow around' the topic. A concluding sentence should reflect the topic sentence, like twin bookends holding the detail sentences in the middle together.
We created a list of overused "no-no" words, which so far includes:
nice
good
fun
a lot (or alot)
awesome (unless used for something TRULY worthy of awe, like God or the Grand Canyon)
We spent the last part of the class period addressing some ideas to make their writing more vivid and to connect with their readers in a more memorable way. I taught that good writing should "show, not just tell." Specifically, we discussed giving life to our writing by including the elements of life:
the senses
motion
emotion
Assignment:
Each student is to write another personal narrative paragraph, which will be a vivid recounting of some small but interesting slice of their lives. This incident must be true, and may be funny, sad, heart-warming, scary, embarrassing, exciting, etc. In particular, they are to include descriptions from at least two of the five physical senses, together with showing motion and/or emotion.
7th - 8th Writing, October 3
Lesson:
We were missing a couple of students this week, since several families were camping. We used class period primarily to discuss some issues that had arisen in students' papers.
The first issue we discussed was use of transitions. Good transitions are essential to lead readers along through the flow of the essay, particularly between the body paragraphs in a longer essay. Specifically, I stated that I prefer that students include transition statements in the opening of each inner body paragraph, rather than at the conclusion of the previous paragraph, as some had been doing. In other words, Paragraph #3 should begin with a brief word or phrase linking to Paragraph #2 before pivoting to discuss the main thought of the new paragraph #3. In this way, each paragraph retains the integrity of a single main topic, which is central to the very idea of a paragraph as a unit of writing.
I realize opinions differ, and other teachers may teach otherwise. In some cases, their way may be preferable. However, this way (linking transitions at the beginning of the new paragraph) is consistent with what I teach about the structure of writing, and also agrees with authorities such as Purdue University Ongoing Writing Labs.
(http://owl.english.purdue.edu/, specifically http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/574/01/)
The second major issue we discussed was the use and format of the concluding paragraph of a five-paragraph essay. The students already have hand-outs detailing this, but seemed to benefit from a refresher. Generally:
~ The first sentence of the final paragraph should reflect the thesis statement.
~ Following that, write a sentence or two reiterating the main point of each body paragraph. (That will be three to six sentences or so.)
~ Depending upon the type of essay, the conclusion ends with a strong statement of the writer's position, a projection of impact, a call to action, or other appropriate way of wrapping up the topic. A pertinent quotation is often effective here, as well.
Assignment:
Each student will write a five-paragraph essay exploring a single intangible quality, such as liberty, leadership. friendship, courage, peace, etc.
To that end, students will want to define terms in their intro paragraph.
They may also want to define the quality in terms of what is is NOT.
They might consider how the quality might be attained or developed, or any other angle that seems helpful in discussing the quality in its essence.
They will need to give examples of their quality in action. These examples may be from any arena: from general and common knowledge, from Scripture, or from the lives of specific individuals(s), living or dead, historical or fictional, etc.
Here is an excerpted example of an intro paragraph defining wisdom:
The majority of people seem to assume rather vaguely that wisdom increases with age and experience. The idea is that if one lives long enough, or makes enough mistakes, one will gather enough knowledge to become wise. By that definition, wisdom is just the knowledge gained during a lifetime. However, wisdom is much more than just knowledge gained. Biblically, wisdom signifies the pursuit of knowledge, the application of that knowledge with understanding, and the personification of God's will in action.
We were missing a couple of students this week, since several families were camping. We used class period primarily to discuss some issues that had arisen in students' papers.
The first issue we discussed was use of transitions. Good transitions are essential to lead readers along through the flow of the essay, particularly between the body paragraphs in a longer essay. Specifically, I stated that I prefer that students include transition statements in the opening of each inner body paragraph, rather than at the conclusion of the previous paragraph, as some had been doing. In other words, Paragraph #3 should begin with a brief word or phrase linking to Paragraph #2 before pivoting to discuss the main thought of the new paragraph #3. In this way, each paragraph retains the integrity of a single main topic, which is central to the very idea of a paragraph as a unit of writing.
I realize opinions differ, and other teachers may teach otherwise. In some cases, their way may be preferable. However, this way (linking transitions at the beginning of the new paragraph) is consistent with what I teach about the structure of writing, and also agrees with authorities such as Purdue University Ongoing Writing Labs.
(http://owl.english.purdue.edu/, specifically http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/574/01/)
The second major issue we discussed was the use and format of the concluding paragraph of a five-paragraph essay. The students already have hand-outs detailing this, but seemed to benefit from a refresher. Generally:
~ The first sentence of the final paragraph should reflect the thesis statement.
~ Following that, write a sentence or two reiterating the main point of each body paragraph. (That will be three to six sentences or so.)
~ Depending upon the type of essay, the conclusion ends with a strong statement of the writer's position, a projection of impact, a call to action, or other appropriate way of wrapping up the topic. A pertinent quotation is often effective here, as well.
Assignment:
Each student will write a five-paragraph essay exploring a single intangible quality, such as liberty, leadership. friendship, courage, peace, etc.
To that end, students will want to define terms in their intro paragraph.
They may also want to define the quality in terms of what is is NOT.
They might consider how the quality might be attained or developed, or any other angle that seems helpful in discussing the quality in its essence.
They will need to give examples of their quality in action. These examples may be from any arena: from general and common knowledge, from Scripture, or from the lives of specific individuals(s), living or dead, historical or fictional, etc.
Here is an excerpted example of an intro paragraph defining wisdom:
The majority of people seem to assume rather vaguely that wisdom increases with age and experience. The idea is that if one lives long enough, or makes enough mistakes, one will gather enough knowledge to become wise. By that definition, wisdom is just the knowledge gained during a lifetime. However, wisdom is much more than just knowledge gained. Biblically, wisdom signifies the pursuit of knowledge, the application of that knowledge with understanding, and the personification of God's will in action.
9th - 12th Writing, October 3
Lesson:
More than half the class was absent today, having gone camping with a group of families from church. For those who were present, we spent the class period reviewing their essays in depth, discussing the revision process with detailed recommendations for improvement.
Specifically, we emphasized fine-tuning thesis statements to make them more workable. My primary point was that whenever an essay just won't flow and the writer finds himself or herself wrestling for clarity, chances are that the thesis of the essay was not clearly focused in the writer's mind first. If thoughts won't congeal, writing never will. Therefore, the writer should first reorganize thoughts, then check that the thesis statement accurately and fully covers the points the writer will be making in the body paragraphs --- no more, no less.
We also briefly covered the concepts of parallel construction and congruence of terms.
Examples of "fuzzy", incongruent thesis statements:
Leadership is seeing a clear course of direction, courage, and communicating.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's in menu selection, taste, and it is open more hours, too.
Examples of revised thesis statements:
Leadership requires seeing a clear course of direction, pursuing it with courage, and communicating it to others persuasively.
A leader motivates others through clear vision, courage of convictions, and persuasive communication.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's in hours of operation, menu selection, and taste.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's because it remains open later, offers a wider menu, and serves fresher food with better flavor.
Assignment:
Since so many were absent, I opted not to assign a new paper.
Rather, students should spend time revising the previous assignment, a five-paragraph compare/contrast essay, with special thought given to clarity of thought and congruence of thesis statement.
More than half the class was absent today, having gone camping with a group of families from church. For those who were present, we spent the class period reviewing their essays in depth, discussing the revision process with detailed recommendations for improvement.
Specifically, we emphasized fine-tuning thesis statements to make them more workable. My primary point was that whenever an essay just won't flow and the writer finds himself or herself wrestling for clarity, chances are that the thesis of the essay was not clearly focused in the writer's mind first. If thoughts won't congeal, writing never will. Therefore, the writer should first reorganize thoughts, then check that the thesis statement accurately and fully covers the points the writer will be making in the body paragraphs --- no more, no less.
We also briefly covered the concepts of parallel construction and congruence of terms.
Examples of "fuzzy", incongruent thesis statements:
Leadership is seeing a clear course of direction, courage, and communicating.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's in menu selection, taste, and it is open more hours, too.
Examples of revised thesis statements:
Leadership requires seeing a clear course of direction, pursuing it with courage, and communicating it to others persuasively.
A leader motivates others through clear vision, courage of convictions, and persuasive communication.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's in hours of operation, menu selection, and taste.
Steak 'n Shake is superior to McDonald's because it remains open later, offers a wider menu, and serves fresher food with better flavor.
Assignment:
Since so many were absent, I opted not to assign a new paper.
Rather, students should spend time revising the previous assignment, a five-paragraph compare/contrast essay, with special thought given to clarity of thought and congruence of thesis statement.
AP Writing, October 2
Lesson:
We went over the timed in-class essays the students had completed, discussing strategies to address specific strengths and weaknesses.
The rest of the class period was devoted to how to write more advanced compare/contrast essays.
Assignment:
Each student will write a five-paragraph, block-style, compare/contrast essay, on a non-literary topic. (The literary prohibition is primarily because these students are so literary already that I want to nudge them out of that comfort zone a bit. Besides, we will be writing many literary analysis papers soon.)
We went over the timed in-class essays the students had completed, discussing strategies to address specific strengths and weaknesses.
The rest of the class period was devoted to how to write more advanced compare/contrast essays.
Assignment:
Each student will write a five-paragraph, block-style, compare/contrast essay, on a non-literary topic. (The literary prohibition is primarily because these students are so literary already that I want to nudge them out of that comfort zone a bit. Besides, we will be writing many literary analysis papers soon.)
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